If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either. - Dick Cavett
Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. --Dennis Miller
What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them? --Marilyn Pittman
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."
